Here's your sign..

I guess you could say I'm a bit superstitious, or at least that's how most people perceive it these days, but to me I feel like I am religiously aware. I take everything as a sign, because I genuinely believe everything happens for a reason. Bad things happen so eventually good things can come.

Remember in the bible God sent messages to his disciples in the form of dreams. Why wouldn't God still do that now? Whenever I have a dream that seems to stick with me more than others I take time to evaluate what it could mean. Because God doesn’t always come right out and say what he is trying to tell you. It’s kind of like when you can’t find the answer to a question in your book and you teacher says “Just keep looking, it’s in there.” Often times we can’t find what we are looking for because we are either looking too hard, or not looking hard enough. For me that is when God slaps me with a sign.

This week I got a big sign that came disguised as a letter. You see I’m one of those people that messed around and planned my whole life out without asking God how he felt about it, and now I’m paying for it. If you want to make God laugh tell him your plans. Every piece of my plan has fallen through, and if I was a quitter I would have already gave up on college and having a career. That’s just the pure honest truth.

I know I’ve told you all about my plans to go to college, get married, have children, and be a nurse, right? Ha. Talk about a hopeless plan. For one I have no intentions at the moment of ever getting married or having children. Granted that may change, I sincerely hope it doesn’t. But, this week I received a letter, remember the disguise for a sign from God, which informed me I wasn’t accepted into nursing school. Naturally you’d assume I got depressingly sad about the news since that was my plan after all. However, I haven’t felt sad at all. Actually I feel a bit relieved.

By now I’m sure you’re thinking “Man, this girl doesn’t know what she wants.” If so, then indeed you’re right. I don’t know what I want, which is a scary thought considering I am in my second year of college and I’m changing majors. I just don’t think I would be me if I didn’t go around changing my mind and making out of the blue decisions. I use to be a planner, but now I realize sometimes you just have to do what’s right for you at that time.

This is my advice to all kids graduating high school or who are in their first year of college, move out. Rather you’re going away to college or going to a local community college move out of your parents house. Moving out has really showed me who I am. When you don’t have anyone there telling you what to do and what not to do you can really see what kind of adult you’re going to be. I honestly believe being on my own has showed me a lot of signs about my career path. I’m going to continue looking for signs, and hopefully I’ll be on the right path soon.

First Impressions

First impressions have always been thought of as the most important key when meeting new people. I know you’ve all heard “make a good first impression, that’s what counts.” However, what I’ve been thinking about this week is that it is not first impression that count, it is how the person acts after they get comfortable with you.

I have met plenty of people who made a good first impression on me, but after getting to know them they turned out to be someone totally different. It’s like when you first meet someone you want to have a relationship with, each one will do nice things to reel in their catch. Once you’ve made your catch there is no motivation to do nice things. This is the time when a persons’ true personality shines through.

Red flags start dropping everywhere if you’ve made a bad catch. Once the person already knows that you’re theirs they will stop masking their true identity. You may notice that the person is actually a controlling, incompetent, psycho. A lot of people begin to notice a person’s personality changes, but do not want to admit it because they still think of them as the nice person they were in the beginning. The truth is if a person is genuinely nice, and cares about you they will continue to do what they did to get you, just so they can keep you.

I’ve noticed a lot of guys have what I like to call the “Momma’s boy syndrome”. Some guys rely on their mothers to do everything for them, and I have another name for the mothers that do that, it’s called an enabler. Their moms cook, clean, do their laundry, remind them of appointments, and anything else they may need. When a guy begins to spend more time with you than with his mother, he will assume you will take the place of the things she normally does for him. Instead of him taking care of you, you’ll be catering to him. This is something you should be aware of before you get in too deep, because you didn’t sign up to be someone’s fill in mother.

On a lighter note you may begin to realize that you caught a real winner. The person may exemplify everything you thought that they were from the beginning. My dad is the best example of this. He still does sweet things for my mom, just to show he cares. If he feels like my mom may be having a bad day he will find any way to cheer her up. Even if it’s just picking up a candy bar for her on the way home, it’s the thought he put into thinking of her, picking the kind he knows she likes, and bringing it to her without her asking.

The important thing is to know your own self worth; everyone deserves someone who will treat them with the importance they gave them before the relationship. It is not okay or normal for someone to start being controlling and vindictive.

You don't know what you've got until...

Have you ever heard that saying, you don't know what you've got until it's gone? That's one of the truest statements I've ever heard. We take for granted the people we have in our lives, and all the little things those people do for us.

I have a huge family on my mom’s side. My mom is 1 of 9. She has 6 sisters and 2 brothers. Each one of my mom’s brothers and sisters has at least 2 children, and my mom and her younger sister are the only ones without grandchildren. We’ve recently counted all of the kids and grandkids; I think it was roughly around 50.
(I just realized that sounds like a complicated math problem, but don't worry I wont make you all do the math!)

It can be easy to take that many people for granted. Sometimes I don’t realize how lucky I am to be blessed with so many family members. Not only do I have that many cousins, but most of us stay in contact with each other, even if it’s just on the internet.

Family is the absolute most important thing to us.

My grandpa always reminded us that we couldn’t pick our family, but when all else failed you always had your family. My grandpa was the heart of our family. He was the most handsome man I’ve ever met. He was well into his seventies with a full head of blonde hair. He never spared an opportunity to remind us that our good looks came from him. I think a lot of us took his wit and charm for granted, I know I did. He passed away last January unexpectedly. About a week after his passing my uncle lost his wife unexpectedly as well. It was a hard time for our family, but we all stuck together.

I think that situations like those make us more appreciative of each other. But, isn’t it a shame that as humans something bad has to happen before we realize what we have? We have to lose someone or something just to realize that it was one of the most vital things to us. This was on my mind a lot this week, especially since my granny was airlifted to Little Rock and put on a ventilator. Luckily she seems to be doing better. However I know this opened my families eyes that we need to visit more often, and let her know we care while we still can.

When I worked in the nursing home it broke my heart when residents’ children only came to visit every few months. Things change in the blink of an eye, and you have to use your time wisely.

Don’t wait until it’s too late to realize that you have someone in your life that needs to be shown they’re appreciated. Use every day to show the people in your life how much they mean to you.  

Anticipation

I haven't always known what I wanted to do with my life. When I was younger I wanted to work an array of different jobs. Vet, dog groomer, orthodontist, teacher, business person, restaurant owner, and plenty of other random occupations were on my mind. I just knew at one point that I was going to be a dog groomer. I’m not sure what in the world made me think that. For one I’m not too fond of animals, especially if they are wet. Second of all I’m sure dog groomers don’t bring home a fortune.

I think I was about 12 when I realized what I really wanted to be. Do you know how you can tell if a career is for sure for you? Number one it’s an actual career meaning you can grow in your work. Secondly you can read or listen to information on the subject without becoming bored or being forced to.

I was about 12 years old, and I was staying the night with one of my older cousins so I could babysit her children while she went to work the next day. She casually changed the television to the Discovery Health Channel where A Baby Story was playing. If you have never watched A Baby Story or any of the other shows of that nature that Discovery Health offered, it is a show discussing the birth process and the effect it has on families. After changing the channel and watching the show for a few minutes she looked at me and said “Oh! I’m sorry. You probably don’t want to watch this, do you?” Even I found my own answer strange when I said “No, I don’t mind, I like this show.”

It all started right there. I would read any kind of health related article about pregnancy and labor. If I was watching television it was on the Discovery Health Channel. It just seemed natural that I would go to school and become a RN and then eventually a Nurse Practitioner. Every since then it has been my goal to get into nursing school. Although I’m now unsure of the exact department I want to work in, since I’ve gained experience from working with elderly people at the nursing home. No matter which department I work in I know that being a nurse is the right career plan for me.

So what am I anticipating you ask? Well the day has finally come. My applications are turned in at two different nursing schools, and I am anxiously awaiting my letter(s) of acceptance. Applying to nursing school is the most tedious nerve racking process. First you complete 64 hours of credit, then you take an entrance exam, fill out applications, and finally play the waiting game.

Apparently people are starting to receive their acceptance letters. Well not this girl. I’m still waiting, and waiting, and waiting…

Hopefully I will know something next week, if I don’t die from the anticipation before then.

They come and go like the seasons...

I bet you all wonder what in the world will be working on my nerves this week, because I blog solely on what is getting under my skin at the moment. Essentially that is what a blog is for, to temporarily relive your thoughts, and compare them with other's thoughts.

This week my mind got carried away with thoughts when I saw a tweet from a younger guy I went to High School with. It’s his senior year, and he said “Has life planned out & im gone stick to it.” This really got me to thinking.

I remember when I was in my senior year of high school I knew for certain I had my life figured out. I was going to graduate, move in with my high school sweetheart, go to community college for two years, transfer to nursing school, get married, move a bigger city, have children, and live happily ever after. WRONG.

This is where we mess up in life. Everyone is on the fast track. We’ve got all these plans that we’re so certain are the way we envision life is how it will end up. But, life doesn’t work that way. The only thing that stays the same is everything changes.

 We need to slow down. If you keep on a fast pace of life you’re going to miss the actual life part. My new motto is “Whatever happens, happens.” We can’t predict what will happen to us tomorrow. Everything could change within seconds. The sooner we embrace the fact that life is an ever changing fast pace marathon that has to be paused and enjoyed every once in awhile, is the time that we can gain true happiness.

You see, life can’t be planned. In my own personal opinion life’s foundation should be your faith. In my case my faith is in the Lord. “Faith is the substance of things hoped for and the evidence of things not yet seen.” Hebrews 11:1. We have to believe that the things we hope for will happen if they are the right things for us. A lot of time we are hopefully of things that aren’t meant for us.

Take for example the way my mind was set on the life I thought I was going to have. I had faith that God was going to take me where I needed to be, and that just happened to have nothing to do with my plans. I graduated, stayed at home with my parents, went to community college for two years, still haven’t made a decision on a nursing school, have no intentions of getting married, or dating, I moved out with a friend, and I’m simply enjoying life.

Life is way too short to only be focused on long term goals. What about this moment? All of these days in between are your life. Don’t miss your life because you’re planning the life you want to have. Take it one day at a time.

“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries, today’s trouble is enough for today…” Matthew 6:34

What's the big deal?

Valentine’s Day started in 269 A.D when a Roman priest named Valentine was executed for his refusal to stop marrying Christian couples. Valentine was known for uniting lovers in marriage. He continued to preach even after he was imprisoned. A friendship began with his jailer’s daughter. They began writing love letters. On his execution day he signed his last love letter to her “From your Valentine”. In Italy and Europe they honor Valentine by having a day to celebrate all the lovers he brought together.

Over the years people’s perceptions of Valentine’s Day has evolved into a materialistic ego boost. I obviously have an opinion for everything; Valentine’s Day is no exception, so I assume you all aren’t surprised that I am going to blog about Valentine’s Day and why people are overly stressing the materialistic side of it.

Have you all been to Wal-Mart lately? It’s like Valentine’s Day vomited all over the front isles. There are huge stuffed bears, for $40! Why in the world would anyone even need a 3 foot tall bear? They’ve got all kinds of candy, cards, and other useless items. Let’s be honest no one ever needs the things they get for Valentine’s Day. Flowers die, stuffed bears get shoved in a closet, and those chocolates usually only have a few good ones in the box. I could be wrong though. Not everyone is like me; most are more sentimental so maybe they keep those special gifts. When did our society become so materialistic? The priest Valentine didn’t say anything about buying your significant other flowers and a stuffed bear to keep your love alive, he wanted couples to unite in marriage and have a holy commitment to one another.

To Valentine love was about the commitment you make to that special someone in your life. Our society has lost the whole meaning of Valentine’s Day. I don’t mean to sound like one of those girls that is pessimistic about Valentine’s Day, but I suppose I am. In my opinion it means more to show affection all throughout the year. If you have to have a national holiday to show your significant other affection and love then there really isn’t much love there.

On the other hand some people genuinely aren’t very affectionate, and Valentine’s Day motivates them to show more affection. It can also be a way to rekindle flames in your relationship. All that is fine with me because I feel like if you make a commitment to someone you should do what it takes to continuously work on that relationship. What I have a problem with is people feeling like they have to have a valentine date and like their boyfriends have to buy them a dozen roses and take them to a fancy restaurant. Love isn’t about material things; it’s about being committed to one another and striving to make the other happy.

This year I wish people would show actual affection to one another, and not just buy useless gifts. What about tomorrow on February 15^th, what are you going to do for your significant other then? How about next month, or the next? Are you still going to be treating them the way you are today? If not, just let it go now.

Southern perspective..

The definition of a southern woman is a woman that cooks a large home cooked meal for her family, while also keeping the house clean, being polite to the neighbors, donating to the church, taking care of the children, and keeping herself in top shape. When outsiders discuss “a southern woman” they have an exact picture in their minds. We all do. Perhaps she looks like this

or maybe this..

In our area it’s just natural to assume women will get married, have children, take care of the house, and now days have a job too. This perception is really getting to me.

I believe our southern society makes young women feel like they have to do all of those things, because “that’s what we do around here”, right? You know it’s true. Ask most young women, “Where do you see yourself in the next 5 to 10 years?” the response will more times\ than not, be married with children.

I know this is a touchy subject, and I’m trying to be careful about how I give my point of view. Don’t get me wrong women in our society get educations too. We have many well educated women with great jobs.

I don’t want to make this a personal situation, but I use to be that girl. The girl that just expects the next step in life is to graduate college, get married, and have children. Your probably wondering what could have changed my perspective. I think it just came to me one day. My eyes just opened, and I realized that it’s okay to just be me. I wish someone would’ve told me a long time before then.

We’re always told we can be anything we want to be, and that’s true. However, no one ever said “You can be whatever you want to be, even if it’s to just be you.” That is because in our society all the rest is a given. It’s an unwritten fact that everyone will get married and have children.

But, let’s think about this from a new direction. What if everyone didn’t get married? What if it was normal to not look for someone to marry, to not assume you will have children, and to solely focus on what you want? No one tells young girls that. In fact they tell them the opposite. Anytime I tell an older adult that I do not plan on getting married, and I do not want to have kids I get the worst looks and comments. I’m sure they feel like I will change my mind, and I may. However for the time being I shouldn’t be criticized for my true goals in life.

This is 2012, you don’t have to get married and settle down. I wish our society would become more accepting of this new modern lifestyle. Not every girl in the south wants to fulfill the image of a ‘southern woman’, and they shouldn’t be expected to be